Syrians Photographed Brushing Teeth Encourages Global Condemnation of Assad

Damascus – Following the accidental release of footage showing a group of young Syrian rebels foaming at the mouth and spitting after brushing their teeth, the UN and other foreign leaders have again condemned the Assad regime under suspicion of using chemical weapons. Video and images of the event were picked up by Reuters and published globally earlier today, with numerous headlines referring to chemical weapons. The tooth brushing event, which is thought to have occurred near the Turkish border where rarities such as oral hygiene supplies can be occasionally smuggled in, occurred sometime during the weekend sources say.

“We cannot confirm what is really happening in this video” stated an unnamed Syrian rebel by email, “but if foamy mint faces is what it takes to finally get some global action here, then that’s what we’ll do.” Earlier reports of canisters filled with poison gas causing severe vomiting fueled the original claims that chemical weapons had been used by Assad.

While it is difficult to corroborate information coming out of the war torn nation, world leaders seem poised to take action against the growing claims of chemical weapon use. The Obama Administration has continually indicated that the use of chemical weapons would be crossing a line. A spokesperson for the White House stated, “Murder your citizenry by bombs, assault rifles, laser guided missiles, shells, flame throwers, tanks or even machetes. But use chemical weapons? Then you earn the ire of the world.”

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