NSA Launches National Email Backup Service

Washington DC – Following weeks of concern and speculation over the reasoning behind secret government programs in which the NSA is believed to have collected large amounts of data on email and internet usage from Americans, the NSA is reporting that the work was a part of a new national email backup service called Track & Trace. “It was and still is meant to be our crowning achievement in adding to the free basic services all Americans should have access to in this country like education not including college, and healthcare emergency services only,” said Erol Fides, spokesperson for the organization.

What began as a program under the Bush administration and carried on through Obama’s, the NSA will publicly launch what it describes as a “massive overhaul of the public internet system with unprecedented save and recovery abilities for email, internet history and transactions.”

While a user friendly product is not expected to be largely available before 2014, the NSA will continue to retain as much data as possible from all Americans using the internet, with the goal of increasing to full 100% coverage by 2020. “You will never accidentally delete an email, clear your browsing history or lose track of transaction ever again. We’ll always have an eye out for you” stated Fides with a wide smile.